Days Before You Came
by anakinodair
Summary: Simon is forced into a treatment at a physiatric hospital after trying to burn someone's house down. There he meets Nathan Young. Nathan, who is nothing like anybody he'd ever met before.
1. It's Jelly Time!

Another day had past, and the sun was on its way down, to give the moon a few hours of glory high up in the sky, in the middle of all the golden stars. The cotton candy-shaped clouds were now drawn out, into thin layers on the evening sky, colored in a red/pink shade by the sun. It was a calm and normal Thursday evening, two weeks into February. The only thing lighting up the empty streets was the dim light from the streetlights. Or, at least this was the case near Rydell's Psychiatric Hospital. It was located in a small village outside London, which meant it was pretty much cut in the middle of nowhere. The building was from the early 1900's, with around thirty rooms for patients, along with a few lounges rooms for the patients, along with a kitchen and a cafeteria. Tea had just been served, and most patients were sat in these lounges to spend an hour or two in peace before heading back to their rooms to get a good night's sleep before another long day of sessions and medication.

This happened to be Simon Bellamy's first day at Rydell's Psychiatric Hospital. He'd joined the rest of the patients early that day, arriving in one of the Hospital's white vans along with two nurses. Most likely to make sure he actually got to the Hospital, instead of being hidden away, or deciding to run away. But, he'd calmly followed the two nurses, as they had a tight grip around his upperarms so he would go along, hopefully peacefully. Simon wasn't a fighter, or a violent teenager. He'd never harm anyone, not if he could go without it. He silently followed them, as they showed him everything, and just tried not to break down in tears. He hadn't wanted this. But here he was, without fighting against it at all, not even once. No, not to other people. But it would be a long night. He was just under twenty, as he had recently celebrated his ninth birthday. He had neat, brown hair, shorter on the sides. And big blue eyes, with a starey look. He was also neatly dressed, A pair of tight, black suitpants and a grey dress shirt with every button bottoned.

However, there he was sat, in the lounge closest to the cafeteria along with some other patients. The old TV was on, showing one of the many Donald Duck shortfilms. There was a strict rule at the Rydell that news, and other stuff from the real world,outside the walls of the Hospital, would only be showed once. And that was during the Afternoon tea at 3pm every afternoon. Instead of watching this shortfilm, or play a board game with the others, he sat and stared at the rest of the patients. He'd always liked to study people, ever since he was a little boy. He'd studied people passing by him on the streets, imagining where they were heading, what their names were, and what their life were like.

A few of the patients were older. Some were thirty, forty, fifty. Even sixty. Maybe seventy too. A few were younger, from eightteen and up. Two of the elder women sat playing chess in one of the corners. One of them must be at least sixty, with white, fluffy hair and more wrinkles than a Shar Pei. She was dressed in a pair of green corduroy trousers and a white blouse. There was a ketchup stain on her blouse, just above her left breast. Simon blushed slightly at that fact that he'd found it, and glanced over at her chess-partner. She was also older, yet much younger than the ketchup-lady. Around fortyfive, if he would need to guess. She was dressed in a grey, slim dress, and her long brown hair was in a neat ponytail, trailing down to her waist. He stared at it for a few minutes, fascinated by the length of it.

His eyes moved to a few of the patients, glued to the TV. One of the lads seemed to be around his age, simply dressed in a pair of beige chinos and granddad top in dark olive green. His short dirtyblonde hair stood in every direction possible, and he quietly rocked back and forth in his seat, with his arms wrapped around himself. One of the elder men were sat in one of the other corners, glaring out at everyone else. He was almost completely bald, and his beard-dressed face was covered in brutal, white scars. Simon gulped, quickly looking away from the man before he could study him fully. He had a slight feeling the man were someone to keep away from.

And the studying went on. Some looked more healthy than others, some seemed more crazy than others. He chewed on his lip, trying to focus on the TV instead of continuing to study them all after one of the younger boys had growled at him, like a wolf.

Suddenly, his name was called, loudly and clear.

"Simon!" He popped out of his daydreams, and gazed at the nurse standing infront of him. "Would you mind helping me to get jelly for everyone?" She gave him a warm smile, raising an eyebrow at him. He swallowed, just continuing to chew on his lower lip. She was in her mid-thirties, with black hair, way too much make-up, especially around her big green eyes, and giant breast. She wasn't beautiful, bt she was pretty enough to be in the 'attractive' list according to most of Rydell's patients.

"I don't like jelly!" The ketchup-lady cried out from her seat, followed by a frown.

"What would Roberta want instead then?" The nurse, Simon had learnt to call Nurse Sarah, asked, turning around to face the ketchup-lady.

"I would love me some peaches." The ketchup-lady smiled wide, showing her yellow teeth.

"Well then, peaches for Roberta, and jelly for everyone else." Sarah let out a soft chuckle, as people started to insist on having jelly. Everyone except the bald, angry man in the corner. "Come on then Simon, just follow me."

The young lad did like he was told, quickly getting up from his seat to follow the nurse towards the locked kitchen. The fridge was in a cupboard-size, and in a different part of the kitchen, as far away from the stove and all the cabinets as possible. Also, the more sharp, and dangerous kithen stuff was in a special place, with at least five locks, to make sure the more violent patients wouldn't be able to get hold of them. For their own safety, along with everyone else's.

"Will you get the trays of jelly from the fridge? Put them on a trolley so it'll be easier to get them out there." Sarah gave him a smile, nodding towards the fridge.

Letting out a soft sigh, he nodded, and without a sound he moved towards the fridge.

"You probably have to pull in the door quite hard, it's old." Sarah chuckled, before sliding out to get some peaches for the ketchup-lady. Simon pulled in the door, repeatedly until it finally opened causing him to almost fall back. He rolled his eyes, breathing out, as he slipped into the fridge-room. Jelly, it was... He looked around, searching through all of the shelfs of bowls, eggs, cartoon boxes containing milk.. He wrinkled his nose, in nurse. Maybe she was just making fun of it, because he was new around here. They probably had a special smaller fridge for these things, and she was standing here, laughing so her giant breast bounced in the tight nurse-outfit.

_Oh, there_. He sucked on his innercheek, as he stepped closer to the shelf furthest into the fridge-room towards the plastic cups filled with green lime-flavoured jelly. Now he only needed to find the trolley. Why did it have to be him. He hated it, he'd just sat in his corner, without a word. He liked it that way. He was used to everything being that way.

"Oi! Weird kid, make sure I get one of the red ones, because I will slaughter someone if they hand me a lime-jelly one more time." A voice behind him suddenly said. "And they smell like a pussy of a eightyear old never-shaved virgin." Simon quickly turned around, almost dropping the tray of plastic cups he was holding. For the next couple of seconds, he just stared at the strange boy infront of him. The boy was dressed in a pair of demin jeans, and a loose white t-shirt. He had a nice face.. Not sexy, or hot, more.. handsome...ish. Not that Simon thought he was. No way. His head was dressed in dark curls and his big green eyes stared back at him, with a glimpse of curiousity.

"Don't just stand there, chop chop!" Simon quickly caught of the tranze, and started to search after a trolley. "They're obviously not in here, if you thought a trolley was some sort of meat." The curly haired lad smirked slightly, raising an eyebrow at him.

"No... I... I..." Simon started, not really sure what to say, swallowing hard, quickly staring down into one of the plastic cups. The stranger was still smirking, and he hoped he wasn't one of the more violent ones. Being locked into a fridge with one of those, no thank you.

"Nathan Young! What have I told you about going in here?" Sarah's voice shouted, while the boy was pulled out of the fridge-room. "You're not dumb, you know you aren't allowed to go in here anymore. Keep to the regular mealtimes!" The boy with the curly hair, obviously being Nathan, laughed softly.

"Relax, I didn't even take anything." He laughed out, trying to get loose from her grip.

"Just go and wait for your jelly!" Sarah shouted, as she throwed him out into the hall, closing the door behind her. "The trolley is out here, love." She popped her head into the fridge, and gave Simon a wide smile.

Simon, who was holding a plastic cup of strawberry jelly for this mysterious boy, mumbled something, before quickly putting it down on the tray, before walking out to put it on the trolley. He couldn't get Nathan's smug smirk out of his mind, and he had a feeling it wasn't the last time he'd get to meet this curly haired nutcase.


	2. Mister Bellamy

Thanks for the reviews, guys! I'm glad you all enjoyed the first chapter. I really appreciate the feedback.

"Would you mind sharing your story with us, Simon?" The man, introuced as Dr. Hannon, asked, as he stared right at Simon. He moved, slightly uncomfortable, in his seat, trying to avoid eyecontact with Dr. Hannon."It's okay if you think it's hard, we'll take it slow."

Group-therapy session. Fifty minutes in, ten minutes to go. He was familiar with all of the other patients sat in the circle with him. He'd studied them all from his corner of the lounge. There was the blonde kid who always rocked back and forth in some sort of worry, and the Indian boy who'd thought he was a bunny rabbit two nights ago. There was also the man in his late 20's, who walked around mumbling to himself. And last but not least, the ketchup-lady. He wasn't sure what had brought her into this place, but he had a strong feeling he'd found out, sooner or later.

Instead of looking at Dr. Hannon, he gazed at the ketchup-lady, taking in every detail of her appearance. She wore the same white blouse, with the ketchup stains on it. In her younger days, she'd probably been a real beauty, with porcelain-looking skin and long, slightly curly hair. There was something tragic about her big blue eyes, a sort of deep that made him both curious and suspicious. Probably a murderer, with voices in her head. He repeats the things he discovers about her, quietly for himself. _Blouse. White blouse. Grey trousers. Eyes, ocean blue eyes. Ketchup-stain. Porcelain doll._

"Mister Bellamy?" Dr. Hannon keeps trying to get his attention. It works, as Simon snaps, and stares at him all of sudden. Dr. Hannon gives him a warm smile. "Would you like to tell us your story, Simon?"

_**Mister Bellamy.**_

_He is seven years old, and his mother is pregnant with his younger sister. Margaret. Her tummy is big, and he can't do more than just stare at him. Stare with wide eyes, trying to understand why babies grow in their mummies's tummies. She's making them chicken sandwiches. It's Simon's favorite. As long as there's slices of tomatoes in it too. He'd give away his whole Indiana Jones collection for a slice of his mummy's chicken sandwich. She's young and beautiful, only twentyeight. She has darker brown, long hair and beautiful chocolate brown eyes. He thinks she looks like a princess. Despite the big tummy. Sometimes he hates it, because she can't play anymore. Sometimes he loves it, because mummy says he'll have a brother or sister soon. Simon doesn't like being alone. _

_His father steps into the room. He looks serious, and grumpy with the grumpy blue eyes, and a grumpy look on his face. He's dressed in his usual light blue jeans and a black dress shirt. He talks to mummy, sluddering on his words. Daddy hasn't noticed Simon yet, and Simon hopes he doesn't. He gasps as his father grabs the chicken sandwich, and shoots up from his place in the corner, still holding one of his toys._

"_That's mine!" He cries out, he'd been looking forward for that sandwich a long time now. Can't mummy make daddy his own sandwich? Daddy just glances down at him, with a laugh, as he shoves it into mouth. Simon hits daddy's leg, lightly but still grumpily. That was Simon's sandwich. Mummy even told him so when she was making it, but she doesn't say anything._

_Daddy's eyes harden again, and suddenly he grabs Simon, who is still hitting anything he can with his small fists. Daddy's mad, Simon knows that, because he's cussing too. Simon is scared now, as his daddy carries him over his shoulder, through the house. He's calling Simon names, he doesn't understand them, but he knows it's not good. _

_Daddy throws him into the shower, and Simon gasps, trying to get loose. There's tears in his eyes. _

_He's sorry, he's so sorry he hit daddy, but that was his sandwich! Mummy would've made more for Da! He repeats his apologies over and over again, but daddy doesn't listen. The cold water hits his skin like needles, and he lets out a cry, trying to kick his way out. Daddy's grip tightens. His clothes are soaked, and stuck to his cold skin, but the cold water keeps on burning against his skin. Suddenly daddy stops and let's go off him. _

_Simon sinks to the bottom of the tub, sobbing quietly. Daddy just looks at him, drying his hands off on his jeans. _

"_Greadyness won't get you anywhere in life, Mister Bellamy. Remember that." Daddy's words echoes in the small bathroom, as he walks out, leaving Simon in the tub, still holding onto his plastic toy. _

_**Mister Bellamy.**_

"I..." Simon started, heart aching by the flashback. Better to just get it over with. "I tried to burn someone's house down." He said sternly, avoiding eyecontact with anyone in the room.

"But you failed!" The blonde kid cried out, with a wide grin on his face.

"Charlie, it's very rude to say such things in a group-session." Dr. Hannon gave the blonde kid a look, who blushed and stared down at his hands, whispering for himself.

"What did you feel in that moment?"

"Anger." Simon mumbled, focusing on a spot on the wall. _Betrayal. Humiliation. Pain. Ache. Longing. Sadness. Loneliness. Forgotten. Used. _Before Dr. Hannon is able to ask further questions about Simon's failed pyroman career, the Ketchup-lady got out of her seat.

"If you do excuse me, Dr. Hannon, the clock just hit twelve, and I believe it's time for my lunch." She said, as she slowly walked towards the door.

"Alright. Same time tomorrow!" Dr. Hannon sighed, as everyone flew out of their seats, running past the ketchup-lady.

Simon slowly followed them, closing the door quietly behind him. The rest of the patients he'd just went to group-therapy with were all way ahead, probably all already in the cafeteria. The corridor was _almost_ empty. He didn't see anyone, as he walked towards the cafeteria. He was dressed in his usual clothes, a dark grey dress shirt with all buttons buttoned, and a pair of suitpants. It made him feel a bit more comfortable in being there. But like mentioned, the corridor was almost empty. He could hear voices longer down, but he could yet not see the person, but for some reason he knew exactly who it was.

"Make them go away then! Go on. Please, make them go away." The voice whined loudly. He remembered that voice, that familiar voice. It was the curly-haired guy from the other day.

Simon wanted to know what was wrong, and find out why he was in here. But he was too nervous and scared too. Instead, he quickly pushed the first door he walked past open, and walked faster towards the cafeteria.


	3. Is it okay if I call you Barry?

"Is it okay if I call you Barry?" The sudden question came out of nowhere and caused him to jump up in his seat. He'd spent way too mch time staring down into his chicken and rce to notice that the curly-haired lad even entered the cafeteria. He glanced up at him, for a few seconds just studying the other boy.

"My name is Simon." He finally said, in a mutter.

"Yeah, yeah, can I?" Nathan smirked crookedly at him as he took a seat next to him.

"W...Why?"

"Well, I think it fits you perfectly, _Barry_." He flashed him a smug look, picking up one of the chicken pieces from Simon's plate with his fingers. Simon just looked at him, chewing on his lower lip before going back to eating his dinner. He was tired, and just wanted to be alone. The session with Dr. Hannaon hadn't been that tough though, since it seemed like Dr. Hannon decided to let him speak when he'd gotten use to it all. Instead he'd sat there, listening to the other patients. Even though he easily, and much rather, slipped into his own world.

"Don't look so grumpy. I'll let you give me a nickname then, because you look like I just offended your cock." Nathan rolled his eyes, sucking on his sticky fingers, caused by the sauce Simon had drowned his chicken and rice in. Simon himself swallowed, trying to focus on everything but that. He quickly studied Nathan up and down to find him a fitting nickname. Messy, curly dark hair, green eyes, tongue.. dressed in a grey t-shirt, a un-zipped black hoodie and a pair of jeans. A idiotic smirk on his soft, red lips.

"Curly." He said after a few more seconds of thinking, looking up at his face again.

"Curly? That's the best you can come up with? That is ridiculous!"

"Well.. I think it fits you perfectly, _Curly_." Simon teased, with a playful smirk forming on his lips.

"Twat! Don't use my words against me!"

Simon chewed on his lip, going back to eating his food while Nathan studied him closely.

"You have very big eyes." The lad suddenly said. "A result from too much porn, yeah? That's why you're here, isn't it?" Simon stared up at him, shaking his head slowly.

"Well, it must be something, doesn't it? Are you a pedophile? Or just generally perverted?"

"Neither!" He cried out, wrinkling his nose.

"You do look like a panty sniffer, you know, Barry." Nathan nodded at him, with a serious look.

"I'm not a panty sniffer." Simon muttered, still staring at him with wide blue eyes. He wasn't sure if he hated this guy, or just disliked him.

"I've ran out of options, mate."

"I tried to burn someone's house down.." He muttered in a whisper, staring down at the rest of his food.

"What was that?" The curly-haired lad rose an eyebrow at him, blinking at him to show that he hadn't listened, well... that he didn't hear him at least.

"I tried to burn someone's house down!" Simon cried out, now staring at him again with wide, angry eyes. Nathan looked at him in shock for half a second before quickly making up a reply.

"Is this some kind of freaky fetish of yours?" He asked, with a calm, terapist-ish voice filled with irony and rudeness.

Simon swallowed, not sure wether to reply him or not. He shoved the last of his food into his mouth, chewing on it silently, as he stared right ahead. Don't look at the twat sitting next to you. Just don't.

"Don't go all mental on me now. I'm only jokin'!" Nathan said, rolling his eyes, shoving his shoulder playfully. Simon just got up, dramatically grabbing his tray.."Oh come on. Don't be ridiculous now."

He didn't stop, he just walked to leave his tray before going back to his room. Didn't want to spend time with anyone. He just wanted to be alone, without a nurse wanting to inject medicine into his veins to make him into a emotionless, shallow zombie. As he walked, he heard Nathan's voice mutter behind him, making Simon glance back curiously, despite being irritated and hurt.

"I'm not being a fucking twat. How could I know he was such a emotional dramaqueen." The voice snapped, while the man it belonged to was faced towards where Simon had sat moments later. Only there was no-one sat there. The boy was talking to the thin air.


	4. Captain Invinsable

First of all, thank you guys for the reviews! They really did warm my heart big time, no but I'm just glad you all seem to enjoy the story. You're all lovely.

Simon frowned, as he stepped into the group session. They'd put him in two different groups, on different days, for some reason. Maybe to see where he best fitted, and felt most comfortable. He'd never seen these patients before. He'd heard from Shaji, the Indian boy, that there was a floor over them where the more violent patients were locked up, being dangerous for themselves and people around them. He'd heard them late at night, whining and screaming in the dark. Thankfully, himself hadn't been described as that violent, despite trying to burn a house down, and had a room next to Shaji.

A woman in her late thirties just stared at him when he silently slipped down on the only empty chair next to her. She had big brown eyes, they almost looked black of anger. He swallowed hard, quickly looking away.

"Alright guys, this is Simon, and he will be joining us on Thursdays from now on." The doctor said, flashing him a comforting smile. "I'm Dr. Sangster, I'm not sure if you remember me, but I was the one to take care of you when you arrived earlier this week." She had a soft tone in her voice, and he couldn't help but stare. She could've been a supermodel, that's for sure. Olive skin, beautiful brown eyes, and dark, long hair in a ponytail. She had soft, red lips that forced him to stare. She looked like an angel. How could he ever forget meeting her?

"I.. I do remember." He mumbled, taking away his gaze from her lips.

"Well, don't you think it's time for a bit of introduction?" She smiled, raising an eyebrow as she gazed at the rest of the patients.

"NO." An elder man grumpily said with a glare, crossing his arms over his chest.

"What if you already know 'em?" A familiar voice said from the left. "Does that mean I can go out and have a smoke?" Simon quickly turned his gaze, to find Nathan sitting there, half-laying in the chair.

"Why don't you tell us how you met then?" Dr. Sangster shook her head, still smiling.

"We're not married, Lena. We only just met in the fridge at jelly-hour." The lad rolled his eyes, letting out a loud yawn. "His name is Barry."

"Simon." Simon mumbled, rubbing his temples.

"Alright, shall we get going? You start, love." Dr. Sangster turned to the woman next to her, with a smile.

"Beatrice." The woman cried out, before hiding her face in her hands.

"I'm William." A younger man muttered from his seat, with a scar from his left eye to his right chin. Simon stared at him for a second, wide-eyed. Better not say anything stupid around these people.

"Rosie!" A light voice said, with a smile. "My name is Rosie."

"Berta." The angry lady next to him yelled, right in his ear. He managed to nod weakly, covering his ear with his hand. The rest of the patients introduced themselves as well, but he didn't really listen. Nathan kept doing silly grimaces behind the patients, sitting between them, backs. Simon really tried not to look, and focus on the names. But he really couldn't, and Nathan just kept going with silly grimace after silly grimace.

"I think that was everyone! Does anyone have anything to say today?" Dr. Sangster smiled, gazing out at them all. Simon quickly looked away from Nathan, and stared down on his hands. "Nathan. Would you like to speak today?" She raised an eyebrow at Nathan, who was still pulling a grimace at Simon. The curly-haired boy quickly stopped, staring back at their psychologist.

"Like what?" He managed to say, after a second or two of just staring.

"About yourself. What you're feeling, thinking, anything, dear."

"Well, I'm hoping that they won't serve the goddamn lime-jelly tonight at jelly-hour. They did yesterday, and it makes me want to throw up." He said, shaking his head like he was utterly dissapointed. "It's that nurse. Sarah. She bloody hates me!"

"Oh, I wonder why." Rosie rolled her eyes, glaring at him.

"Rosie, be nice, love. And, I can tell you're upset, Nathan, but is there something other than jelly on your mind?"

"Well.. not really, no." Nathan was chewing on his lower lip, as Simon studied him. He could tell he was lying. He could tell there was something fighting inside of him. He could see it in his eyes, they looked more sad, more focused on forcing everything to remain in there.

"Where is Jamie then? How is he?" Dr. Sangster asked, her attention still drawn to Nathan.

"He's obviously not here, is he? With all you wankers? Hell no." He shook his head, with a groan.

"Prick." Beatrice cried out, still hiding her face in her hands. Simon continued to study the floor infront of him, listening to the conversation. Who was Jamie? Why wouldn't he be at a group session if he was a patient?

"What do you think he's doing then?"

"Well, he's probably checking some bird out. The fact that they're all nuts doesn't mean they're not fit, am I right?" Nathan stretched his legs out, followed by another loud yawn.

"Okay, why don't we just continue tomorrow, guys? You did the presentations excellent! Don't forget, 10am tomorrow!" She winked the nurses sat in the corner of the room towards them. Simon got out of his seat, slowly walking towards the door. He didn't need a nurse to hold a firm grip around him to make sure he didn't go apeshit on everyone else. Although, he did know there would be a nurse to welcome him on his own floor.

"I'm harmless!" Nathan frowned, outside the session room, as he'd tried to storm past some nurses. "Don't bloody touch me!" He managed to get loose, and pretended to brush their touch off his clothes. "I thought you were supposed to be male nurses, not baboons!" He shouted after them, as they walked away with the other patients.

"Are you alright?" Simon was stood a metre from him, studying him carefully.

"Let's put it this way, they can try all they want with me, but it won't matter. BECAUSE I'M IMMORTAL, YOU PRICKS!" The boy smirked crookedly, turned towards the hallway the nurses was walking through, screaming the words out so they would be able to hear it. "Now excuse me weird kid, I have much more important things to do than stand here with you!" With those words, he walked off, leaving Simon just looking after him, blinking numerous of times to try and let what just happened sink in. Nathan said he was... what?


	5. Immortality is a bitch

Thought I'd give ya'll another chapter now when it's New Years Eve and all that. So here you go, a Nathan based chapter.

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><p>"Hello, Nathan. Please sit down." The doctor smiled warmly at him. He just stood there, staring at him, chewing anxiously on his lower lip.<p>

"I... I just wanted... She had no right to interrupt me." He finally said, studying the wall behind Dr. Stewart.

"You know you're not supposed to harm yourself, love." She let out a soft sigh, patting the bed next to her seat. "Please, sit down. You're bleeding."

"I want to go to my room." He mumbled, glancing down at his hand.

"Do you know why you hurt yourself?" Her voice was annoying calm, and caring. He hated the nurses, and the doctors.

"I.. Maybe.. If it happens slow, then maybe I'll die." His words came out as a whisper, forcing the tears to remain un-cried.

"Would you like to explain that further?" She patted the seat again, and he slowly stumbled over, sitting down on the bed. Dr. Stewart got out of her seat to grab bandages and a scissor.

"Can't you just do this in silence?" He frowned, rolling his eyes. Didn't want to talk about it.

"Where do you have Jamie then? I hardly ever see you not talking to him these days."

"He doesn't like doctors."

"And why's that? I wouldn't hurt a fly, you know that."

"When he was seven, they pulled out the wrong tooth, and ever since he hates them. I can hardly blame him." He frowned at the memory of that day, all those years ago.

"Dentists pull teeth out, not doctors like us."

"It's practically the same thing." Nathan rolled his eyes, biting down his lip as she started to clean the wound.

"What did you use this time?" She sighed, shaking her head as she glanced up at him. The wound looked terrible. Not that deep, but it was filled with dirt. It took him a few seconds of thought before opening his mouth again to answer her.

"A stick..." He mumbled, not daring to look at her. "From the garden."

"Are we supposed to not even let you out in the garden? That's really dangerous, Nathan. Not that harming yourself in any way isn't, but that's extremely dangerous. Don't ever do that again. Come talk to me instead." She sighed, as she wrapped the bandages around the somewhat clean wound. "What is it you think will happen if you hurt yourself? How will it help you?"

Nathan looked at the bandage for a few minutes, not sure wether to speak or not. The cocky shell he put on was gone now. There was the lonely little boy, emotionally disturbed and harmed.

"I see him at night, you see. He's.. He's always looking at me, with a giant grin. He has a cigarette between his lips, and he's so happy. We're.. Wer're invinsable. Nothing can beat us." He swallowed, taking a deep breath before continuing. "The next moment he's on fire. He's looking at me with eyes filled with pain. The happiness in those blue eyes are completely gone, and I can tell he is afraid. He starts to scream, not words, just screams. The smell of burnt flesh is reaching my nose, and it makes me want to puke. But I can't. I'm just laying there on the ground, because I can't get up. My head is bleeding, and my leg hurts. Everything hurts. All I can hear is his screams. I don't want to see it, I don't want to see him, but I can't look away. Everything goes dark.. but his scream echoes in my ears."

He hasn't even realised all those words came out of his mouth. He'd never spoken them before. Didn't dare to. Now when they're out, he looks back at Dr. Stewart, ignoring the fact that he knows that the tears has welled up in his eyes whilst he spoke. They're running down his cold cheeks, and they burn. They burn like fire, and stings like ice. He shouldn't have said anything. He'd never spoken of it. Dr. Stewart doesn't say anything, so he closes his eyes again.

There he is again. He is burning, laying there on the ground. He searches for comfort from his older brother, but Nathan can't give him any. He wants to tell him it's going to be alright, but he can't. _It hurts. Nathan. It hurts. Make it go away, please. Nathan! It hurts... _

"Nathan!" Dr. Stewart shakes him and he opens his eyes again, taking a deep breath. His heart feels like it's about to explode in his chest, and he just stares at the doctor.

"I don't want to be immortal anymore." He stammered, completely out of it still, tears rolling down his cheeks. "I lived but he didn't. If I do it slowly... maybe it will reverse." He whispered. He'd never ever spoken these words in a long time. Not to anybody. They echoed in his head day and night, but it'd been months since they passed his lips.

"Why don't we get you to your room?" Dr. Stewart said, wiping away his tears carefully. "Would you like a cup of tea? Some jelly?"

"Strawberry jelly." He mumbled, and wiped away his tears on his own as he stood up again, on shaky legs. "Two cups. Jamie's in my room, waiting." He'd gone back to denial, and his doctor sighed softly, but nodded.

"Why don't we get the strawberry jellies on the way to your room?"


	6. Supply closet conversations

I will admit that this isn't the best chapter I've written, but it had to be done, so I hope ya'll will enjoy it anyway. And thanks again for all the nice reviews. And I got a question about wether he actually was immortal or not.. Only time will tell, I can't say more than that. :)

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><p>"How are you feeling today?" Dr. Hannon smiled warmly at Simon, who studied his hands silently in the armchair.<p>

"I'm.. I'm fine." He mumbled quietly. Fine as in extremely tired, because you haven't slept anything because of the nightmares. Fine as in hearing the patients on the floor above scream and cry at night. Fine as in being completely fucked bit his lip at the reply he gave himself in his mind, not daring to look up at the doctor. He wasn't a fan of doctors, they always scared him as a young boy.

"_How on earth did you get these bruises, boy?" The doctor asked him, glancing up at him, as he was around his lower leg. The broken leg had been described as an accident when he tripped over a rock in the backgarden. _

"_He fell out of the apple tree." Simon's father muttered from the corner. The local doctor glanced at his father, and then back at Simon. He was pretty old, grey, short hair and harsh blue eyes. He looked serious, and bitter. It always scared the crap out of Simon when they looked like that._

"_You really need to be more careful, son. Your dad can't drive you up here just because you're clumsy." Dr. Scott muttered, finishing up with the cast. Simon screamed inside. _It was him! I promise it wasn't me. It was him! All I did was say that I didn't like the food. _His father's face had been completely emotionally cold, as he battered his mum's rolling pin at least twice against Simon's lower leg. He swallowed hard, just nodding at the doctor, who messed with his hair._

"_Well, boys will be boys, eh? Try and stand up and I will get you some crutches."_

"Well, is there anything you'd like to talk about?" Dr. Hannon studied him, still smiling. Why were they always smiling? How could they possibly keep a warm smile on their faces, when there was so much evil and horror in the world, and they knew about it? He could never understand how they could keep smiling in this world. Like nothing ever happened. He just shook his head, glancing up at him briefly.

"No.. Nothing."

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><p>Simon walked down the corridor, anxiously chewing on his lower lip after that failed session with Dr. Hannon. He knew he had to open up at some point but it was just.. hard. He didn't want people to know, yet he did. All he'd ever wanted in his life was someone who cared. Not someone who claimed she loved him more than any man in the entire world, four laps around the world and back, and then still just let it happened infront of her eyes. Why couldn't he just tell them? He'd never done anything to hurt Margaret. Margaret was his father's little princess. Only Simon. Simon wasn't special. He didn't have blonde locks, and beautiful blue eyes like Margaret. He was just Simon, and his father wishes that Simon had never been born. He didn't even matter. The corridor had never before felt as long. It was like the shadows stalked him, and it felt darker than it used to.<p>

"Psssst! Wierd kid...! BARRY!" A, now quite, familiar voice hissed from somewhere. He glanced around, wrinkling his nose, trying to figure out from where. "Oi! In here, you twat!" A door opened, and the light shone out on him, and the shadows seemed to run off in fear. The part of the corridor where he was standing once again turned brighter, and for a few seconds his heart didn't seem just as heavy. A familiar jungle of curls popped out within half a second, and Nathan grinned wide at him, singing at him to come closer. Simon bit down his lip, slowly walking closer.

"What?" He asked, slightly curious about what was behind the wooden door. The boy didn't answer, just gripped his arm, quickly pulling him inside. As soon as he was, Nathan closed thedoor without a sound.

"What is this? What do you want?" Maybe he turned out to be violent? A rapist? A cannibal? Simon's imagination took over, causing him to take a step back. The curly-haired lad gripped his arm again, stopping him from taking yet another step back.

"Watch out. Ther'es a bookcase right behind you. You don't want to make everything fall over and re-create us as pancakes, now do you?" Nathan gave him a brief smile, as he let go off his arm, glancing around. "This is one of the supply closets. Sadly one of the smaller ones, but I'm sure we'll manage."

"Manage...what?" This boy was beyond strange.

"Well, I did take a cake from the kitchen without getting caught just half an hour ago! But if you don't want to share it, then fine, weird kid. You know where the door is." Nathan rolled his eyes, as he sat down on the floor.

"I... sure..." Simon sat down as well, watching the other boy pull out a sponge cake from the lowest shelf of the bookcase behind him.

"I've got strawberry lemonade too, if you're into that."

"You really like strawberries..." Simon couldn't help but smirk.

"Reminds me of a fine summer day, so how can I not?" Nathan grinned smugly, handing him the bottle.

"Why... Why did you invite me in to eat it with you?" Simon said after awhile, glancing up at him. Yeah, invite him in as in pulling him inside without a warning!

"Hey! I might not like you or anything, but I'm not that much of a dickhead that I don't invite fellow nutjobs to eat a delicious sponge cake with me." Nathan shook his head, taking a large sip of the strawberry lemonade. "Besides, Jamie has never been a fan of sponge cakes. Or strawberry lemonade. He's a blueberry guy."

"Who's Jamie?" Simon wrinkled his nose, studying him.

"He's my brother." He had millions of questions, but he feared of asking too much. He glanced around, stopping to look at Nathan's wrists for awhile.

"Wha...What happened?" He stammered, almost afraid to know the answer.

"Oh y'know. One of the violent patients decided to dig his fingernails into my wrists. Hurt like a motherfucker. Started bleeding and everything." He rolled his eyes, shoving another piece of sponge cake into his mouth. Terrible, terrible lie. Simon could see right through it.

"Are you really immortal?"

"No of course I'm not, I just said it because I was bored." Nathan frowned. "Yes, I am."

"Is that why you're here?" Simon asked quietly, glancing up at him.

"You may be surprised, but when you tell people that you are immortal, they tend to think you're absolutely mental."

"Why don't you prove it to them then?" He titlted his head slightly, studying the other boy. His green eyes refuses eyecontact with Simon's blue eyes. He looked tired though, like he hadn't slept for ages, Simon knew how that felt, what it was like. He could easily see when others had the same problem. He wondered what Nathan could have nightmares about, what kept him up at night. Was he one of those who screamed and cried? Or was he one of those who silently stared into the darkness, about to explode inside?

"And how would I do that exactly?"

"Well... If you're immortal you won't age, right? So, if you never age then.." His love for this started to take over.

"Hardly, no. I haven't really figured this whole thing out, you see. There's always a chance I'll grow till I'm like 40 and old and then stop! Then it would take years to prove it to them. Boom, plan crushed." Nathan rolled his eyes, with a sigh. "What did you then, weird kid?"

"I... I tried to burn someone's house down." He mumbled, glancing around.

"You think fire is fun, eh?" Nathan's face had changed now, as he stared at Simon. He looked furious, and dangerous. There was something in his eyes that he just couldn't put his finger on what it was.

"I... No!" He stammered, now slightly creeped out.

"Could you please drop my sponge cake and get the hell out of the supply closet? I don't do conversations with firebugs. Plus, you look like a bloody panty-sniffer!"

Simon quickly got to his feet, rushing past Nathan, towards the door. He didn't stop until he was in his room again, didn't care about the nurses and patients staring and shouting after him as he came running by. Well, that went well.


	7. The thoughts of a shy boy

Sorry, it's been ages since I last posted. At least it feels like it. It's been alot with school and stuff, but here's another chapter. It's more of a filler, I guess. Pretty much just having an over-look in Barry's brain.

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><p>Simon Bellamy loved to study people. He considered himself a pretty good studier. He'd done it for as long as he could remember, because people fascinated him. Billions of people in the world, yet not a single one of them looked exactly the same. Sure, identical twins were identical, both there were still things that seperated them look-wise. The sound of their voice, birthmarks, scars, a special glimpse in their eye. The list of suggestions for diffrences went on and on. The more he studied, the better he got.<p>

It also allowed him to fade away himself more and more. He wasn't expected to talk whenever he wanted to at home, which rubbed off when it came to school. But the teachers adored the little boy, despite his weird habits. He did exactly what they wanted him to do, he didn't create chaos like the other boys, and he called them sir or ma'm. In their eyes, he was just well-behaved little child, a tad shy, but well-behaved and good-hearted. Although, this was not appreciated by any other child in his class, and he was soon known as the Weird Kid. The one friend he'd gained, a neighbour boy called Matt, quickly abandoned him. By the age of eight, Simon Matthew Bellamy was completely oblivious to the rest of the world, as he usual shut it out, in order to stay in his beloved imaginary world. But no-one noticed, because of course, he was just a well-behaved, shy boy.

At home things got harder. His younger sister Margaret was now a year old, and their father's pride and joy. He smiled and played with her, in a way he had never done with Simon. At least he had his mum. His mum, the only person who seemed to notice that he was there. She could just look at him, really look at him, and he knew he did actually exist. There was no-one greater than Judith Bellamy in his world.

"_Why doesn't he like me?" Simon suddenly said, sat in the warm sand. The question had been burning in his head for the last hour, and he finally had the courage to let it past his glanced over at his mother, who was eating a peach, just like he was._

"_What are you talking about?" She let out a soft chuckle, gazing at him, raising an eyebrow. She really did think he couldn't tell she knew what he meant, didn't she? That she always forced herself to tell him lies, with a smile on her face. He wasn't stupid, he was turning nine the following month!_

"_Papa." He said, tilting his head to the side as he stuied his mother closely._

"_He has a bad temper, I know, but he does love you. You're his son, Simmy." She always called him Simmy. He liked it, it made him feel special. He knew that was the end of the discussion. He didn't want to ask more either, because the subject always brought something weird to his mummy's gaze and he didn't like it. He let out a soft sigh, trying to study the sea instead. _

The years past by, and Simon kept studying people. He barely realised he was doing it, it just came naturally. He got better and better at reading people, and memorising clothes and looks. He started to develop a new world in his head, and all these people existed in that world. They had names, families, personalities.. problems, relationships... Everything. Down to every bloody detail.

Most stories about all these people were told to his younger sister. She loved his stories, and begged him to tell them, even though she could barely speak properly. There was the guy who owned at least twenty cats, walking all over the place. Or the shy girl who actually was a princess in a land far, far away. His father called them ridiculous fantasies, his mother called them very creative stories. Simon knew they were real. At least to him, at least in his head. They all walked around there, whining and giggling quietly, doing crazy stuff so he had something to tell his baby sister after dinner every night.

They still walked around there, and it was getting quite crowded up there. But he never missed a detail. And today wasn't any different from the day before, or the day before that. His session had just ended, without a word. They'd given him medication, but he kept quiet. He didn't want them to know. About the voices in the silent of the night, when he was laying there in his bed, trying to remember why he went to bed every night, only to wake up to another day of the same routine. About the voices, the cries from the younger version of himself. Cries of anxiety, and fear. _I didn't do it, daddy, I promise! _The shame, and the pain.

Nathan had made him wonder about the next day, even if he couldn't bring himself to admit that he had enjoyed the curly-haired boy's company whenever he decided to pop up. It had been a week since that failed conversation in the supply closet. He felt a loss, which he had never felt before, because he'd never had anyone to loose. The boy hadn't even been to the group session, apparently he felt a bit ill. Which is Simon found a ridiculous thing to say at a Pschyatric Hospital. He could barely focus on the telly with all this in his head. Why did Nathan react so violently when he told him what he'd done? There had been something in those green eyes, but he hadn't been able to tell what it was. Although, he'd seen those curls loads of time in the past week. Sneaking around everywhere, watching him like a spy. Did it have anything to do with why Nathan was here, or why he thought he had the power of immortality? And if he hated him so much for it, why did he follow him? He'd tried to go and talk to him, but as soon as he gazed too long at the curls, the other boy disappeared as fast as he could.

He needed to find him, he needed to know. Maybe.. Maybe they could be friends?


	8. It's okay to feel happy

"Fine. You fucking ignorant, rude, scummy-twat-wanker son of a bitch." Nathan rolled his eyes, standing infront of the pale boy in the lounge one day. Most patients were eating their lunch, but Simon had already finished him, and had been allowed to head back to watch telly. He glanced up at the curly-haired boy, wrinkling his nose slightly. What exactly did he want to say with that?

"W-What?" He managed to mumble, a bit confused. Did that mean they could talk again?

"I said, fine you stupid, pyromanic murderer." The other boy groaned. "Everyone else just threatens to kill me as soon as I open my mouth. You don't." He chewed softly on his lower lip, not really keen on showing his more emotional side once more for the creepy, pale patient. "I can live with the fact that you're a sick person."

"I didn't kill anyone." Simon whispered, studying his hands instead. "I didn't go through with it either." He'd always liked animals, and used to have a cat named Tony but his father had ended up killing it because it annoyed him, apparently. Animals were usually innocent, he didn't want to hurt them. Never. Although, Nathan didn't seem so keen on dicussing this subject any longer, and chewed softly on his lower lip.

"Would you like some jelly?" He asked, raising an eyebrow at the other lad.

"I... It's not jelly-hour." Simon mumbled, briefly glancing at him before looking back at the TV.

"That's like a thief going "well the door's locked so let's go home and have some tea". Jesus christ, you pussy."

After another few inputs of worry from Simon's side, they were wandering through the corridor leading towards the kitchen. The curly-haired lad whistled, and hummed on some sone he'd heard on the radio the other day.

"Can you walk any slower?" He rolled his eyes, as he glanced back at his friend. If he continued to walk like that, of course they were getting caught.

"Why is everyone so obsessed with jelly?" It was all the patients ever seemed to talk about. Jelly.

"Because it's the only thing to look forward to at a place like this." His tone was bitter, as he once again rolled his eyes. "Which once again reminds me that I'm stuck here with a bunch of wankers like you." His words made him wrinkle his nose, a bit hurt.

"I think Sarah's nice." The words were true, the nurse had been nothing but lovely and kind.

"Well, now that's your poor judgement speaking, Weird Kid." His friend rolled his eyes once again as they got closer to the kitchen. "As soon as you do something she doesn't agree on, I hope you remember to sleep with the light on."

"Are... Are you on her bad side?" Simon couldn't help but wonder, the hatred towards Sarah just seeped out of Nathan's words.

"I'm on everybody's bad side."

"Why?" He'd always been curious, but that usually made him study people, but there was something about this guy that made him want to ask questions in all eternity.

"It's just the way it is." The curly haired boy said, with a weird look. He seemed to be in thoughts, like he was questioning the way things were. But then he quickly popped back, setting his eyes on Simon's. "Don't expect me to like you, because I don't. You're a freaky little physco, but you'll do."

Bellamy just nodded, staring back at him. He could see everything, Nathan was trying to hide away, in those green eyes. But he wouldn't tell, or speak of it, he was afraid of losing the only friend he'd ever had. He was satisfied with the words "you'll do". It felt like the nicest thing somebody had ever told him. He knew it was probably not what the other boy meant, but it gave him a warm feeling inside, a feeling of being enough for at least someone. "Okay." He wanted to say much more, but it was the only thing that would come out of his mouth as he nodded.

"All right, watch the door and I will sneak in and get the jelly, alright Pale Face?" Nathan raised an eyebrow at him before turning around. He fumbled with the lock for a few moments before the door smoothly opened. With a smug grin, he slipped inside. Simon slowly closed the door, glancing around. What was he supposed to do if somebody came along? Nathan hadn't given him some sort of noise to make if somebody was coming, or entering the kitchen.

His heart was beating fast, and he kept gazing around in the hall, like he was expecting a couple of nurses coming running up to him. But he didn't have to worry long, because soon enough there was a knock on the door. He turned around, just staring at the door.

"Is it safe, you wanker?" Nathan's voice hissed from inside. Simon quickly knocked back as an answer and the door opened. He just shook his head at Simon before shoving a package of jelly into his hands. "There you go. Not that you deserved it, you really need to learn about secret codes and stuff, mate. Let's go before someone finds us."

They both sprinted down the empty halls, trying to make sure they didn't drop the jelly, until the reached the door leading to the backgarden. Of course there was nurses and wardens, and alot of patients, but yet it was much calmer than inside. And warmer, for sure.

"It'll be harder for them to caught us with this outside." Nathan said, after moments of silence, just standing infront of the door. He turned to Simon with a meaningful look, who just nodded. And without another sound, they slid out the door, out into the warm sun. Without seeming suspicious they made it to one of the bigger trees. Slipping down to rest against it, Nathan let out a happy sigh. They'd made it. Simon couldn't help but feel proud of himself. They had actually stole jelly from the fridge. Together.

In the middle of eating their cups of jelly, they glanced at each other. Both with a slight smile. And without a warning, they both started laughing loudly, trying not to choke. Every little problem was blown away, and everything felt good. Wether they wanted to or not, the jelly-robbery had gotten them into a friendship. They had an understanding that was hard to find in other places. Despite Nathan's constant mocking of him, Simon felt happy today. It was a weird, warm feeling. He couldn't actually remember when he last felt it, but he just knew what it was. Happiness. At least.


End file.
